Childish Games

My narcissist and I have children together and we had a decade long relationship. You would think that two professionals in such a situation would have no time for childish games. Why do narcissists insist on engaging in childish games?

My ex would play head games with me for weeks and then when I finally had it and told him I wanted to leave him the games would get worse. It always started with him suddenly in dire need of attention. For example he would miraculously pass out from the stress, he would get results from the doctor that indicated he 'might' have cancer or he would all of a sudden become suicidal because he couldn't live without me. For the first few years I would fall for it because I had empathy. But after about five years I got sick of his sudden drama and hypochondriac loathsome self. So I would then just resort to mocking him or calling him on his bluff. This only angered him and his twisted brain would concoct some other ludicrous way to get my attention. This was all it was....a way to get my attention. Because whether it was good or bad attention the narcissist got what he craved...my attention.

I was reminded that this is what all narcissists crave this week. A lady found my Facebook page and I was happy to see that sharing my experiences had helped her. Unfortunately for her, her ex found her posts and started to put his own posts on my page. How pathetic that he could not allow her to have anything of hers unblemished with his ugly presence. This brought back a wave of terrible memories of childish games my ex played on me. So here are a few:
1. He used my email address of ten years to sign me of fir every kind of junk email. So I would get emails that started out with "dear james". It was his way of letting me know he existed.
2. He put a key logger on my personal laptop to spy on me.
3. He put a password on my personal laptop then made me pay him $200 to take it off.
4. He would turn off my cellphone service if I didn't comply with his demands. Five years and five different numbers. I have had the same number for the last three years since leaving him!

There are so many more that I could share...the point is that these narcissists have no boundaries in their quest to get the attention of their victims.

I learned the hard way to keep my life hidden as much as possible from this crazy person. I try to never divulge more than I have to. He still tries his hardest to find out what I am up to via Facebook, Internet searches of me and my friends, etc. My boyfriend is a very open person and kept his Facebook open so everyone could see his wall. For months my ex would comment on every little post or picture he could find. I finally had to ask my boyfriend to hide his posts. It is unfortunate but those close to us also need to take precautions to not get entangled and ensnared in the crazy world of the narcissist.

I take precautions daily to keep the craziness our of my life. For instance I tell the kids I am going on vacation but never the location or exact dates. Or I just plain fib about what I am up to. I hate doing it but it is how I keep myself safe.

The boundless energy of the narcissist...I wish I could just wish it away. *sigh*